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Thursday, May 31, 2012

Kids

Just an observation for me:  It is so much fun to have babies, so much joy.  You work 24/7 but I remember overflowing with love and energy.  It is also fun to communicate with your children when they are young adults: different outlook on life, a lot of chances to update myself and expand into this world.  My son and my step daughter are smart, efficient, interesting people.  They are so much more aware  than I was at 26.
Teenage years - I do not know.  I am curious how I am going to survive or handle...I realized today that my baby is gone and this new being who always knows better, speaks very fast too to make sure there is no attempt to put any of my thoughts into the conversation, who is very emotional and actually seems to want to have these emotions, has arrived.
I took her to India last July.  Tank you God for helping me with this because at least now she has a reference point.  By reference point I mean a state when you are peaceful inside, un-clutched, blissful.  She experienced it Bidadi last year.  Maybe she does not want to remember about it all the time but she has that reference at least.  And I am praying that Swamiji will take care of her.  21 darshan at En-genious should work...We shall see.
I better write about materializations...

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