Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Miracles expectations

We all have that immense longing for miracles and fairy tales.  We invented a story of Santa and in the spirit of Santa create all sorts of good deeds.  Then later we hear from our teenagers: You lied about Santa for many years and how do I know that you did not lie about other stuff.  We have Valenite's day – from preschool they bring cards and get cards from everybody -- no exceptions.  Then they get to Middle School where they expect to get the cards but ............they are big now so no Valentines for everyone from everyone.  It is a couples day now so we get a lot of frustrated teenagers who are longing to belong and be loved and they have one day when officially they are not either loved or accepted.I thought about Vedic Tradition again and I  believe it is the  best idea.  You expect miracles from God only, you get them sometimes from God and no other fake holidays or figures.

Saturday, February 4, 2012

iClub is in the paper

Sparta Middle School club uses tech to explore new concepts

Posted: Feb 03, 2012 1:40 AM ESTUpdated: Feb 03, 2012 1:55 AM EST
Photo by Daniel Freel/New Jersey Herald Sparta Middle School students, from left, Alice Sungurov, seventh grade; Olivia Ledingahm, eighth grade; Rebecca Cristillo, eighth grade; and Brooke Alvarez, eighth grade, gather around a computer to watch a video.
Photo by Daniel Freel/New Jersey Herald Sparta Middle School students, from left, Alice Sungurov, seventh grade; Olivia Ledingahm, eighth grade; Rebecca Cristillo, eighth grade; and Brooke Alvarez, eighth grade, gather around a computer to watch a video.
SPARTA -- In this technology-saturated world of iPods and iPhones, students at Sparta Middle School are joining an iClub where the "i" stands for intelligence.
"Intelligence is nothing but the ability to respond spontaneously to a situation or challenge," said club adviser Elena Zelenina.
Zelenina, owner of Biryukov Academy of Art & Music in Sparta, started the iClub to give middle schoolers an opportunity to awaken intelligence through talks, yoga and meditation, while also being creative with technology and art.
"You have to find what excites the people you are teaching and then you use that," said Zelenina, who uses the middle school students' love of computers, cell phones and cameras to teach them about their own intelligence.
At the iClub's second after-school meeting Thursday in the art room, 10 students ranging from sixth to eighth grade tackled the topic of self-love just in time for Valentine's Day.
Zelenina discussed with the group the feelings people have on Valentine's Day, whether it be excitement, loneliness, love or sadness. She explained that when children are in elementary school the teacher encourages everyone to bring a Valentine's Day card for each classmate, but once students get to middle school, they may feel upset to not get Valentine's Day cards from every classmate.
"How do you feel on Valentine's Day when you don't get 30 valentines?" Zelenina asked.
She explained that later in life a single person might feel upset if he or she doesn't have someone giving them a Valentine's Day card, chocolates or roses on Feb. 14. But, Zelenina said that this emotion can be broken by understanding and self-love, such as buying yourself a red rose.
"Look into an unpleasant emotion and make sure you understand it," she said. "Then, you can break it."
To further visualize what self-love is, Zelenina stacked glasses in a pyramid shape. She poured water from a red bowl into the top glass and the students watched as the top glass overflowed to fill the lower-tier glasses. She explained that by first filling the most important glass, yourself, then you can pour love into the other glasses, or people, in life.
"Until you all start loving yourself, you cannot share it," Zelenina said.
Each of the 10 students was then given an opportunity to recite a Buddhist meditation mantra about self-love.
"Let this good person, Olivia, be healthy, successful and kind," eighth-grader Olivia Ledingahm recited.
Each student after her said the mantra filling in their name and the things they want in life -- success, confidence, strength, love, money, happiness.
At the end of the one-hour club, Zelenina broke the group into three and gave each group a piece of technology. The challenge was to use the technology creatively to express self-love.
One group molded their bodies into each letter of the word "LOVE" to photograph. Another group used a flip camera to interview people in the library about what self-love meant to them.
The new club will focus on love for the next few months so the students can explore this often-misguided topic using art, technology and other creative ventures.
The iClub was born from Zelenina's own experiences with meditation training in India and her master's degree from her home country of Russia. In 2010, Zelenina was part of a creative team that designed the curriculum for the "eN-Genius" program in India. This helped her to establish what she wanted to do with her own daughter, a Sparta Middle School seventh-grader, Alice Sungurov, and the other students at Sparta Middle School.
She wanted to help them avoid stress while awakening their own intelligence.
"It's the ability to live in a highly intense life without traditional stress," Zelenina said. "You can change all that without changing the position of where you are. The younger you are, the easier it is. The transformation of kids is light speed."
In November 2010, Zelenina started PEAK, a similar group that was composed only of students at her art studio. A well-known meditation teacher, Martyn Williams, who goes by the spiritual name Dheera, which means courage, came to speak to the PEAK group for a "From Everest to Enlightenment" talk that outlined his mountain climbing life to meditation to spiritual enlightenment.
"My kids were fascinated by him and his stories," Zelenina said.
The PEAK group was able to go on Skype with an ashram in India to learn chants and was able to do other meditation classes, but Zelenina wanted to extend the program into the public schools.
With approval from the Board of Education in July 2011, she set out to get the club started. The club first met Jan. 26 with five students and a week later attracted 10 students looking for a creative outlet.
Zelenina is focusing the group on love for the rest of the year, but she also hopes to venture with the group into fear, desires, confidence, bullying and other topics that affect adults and children. The group will also have guests to teach yoga, meditation and acting.
The children will learn techniques to thrive in the often-difficult middle school world.
"It is about becoming more sincere in what they do," Zelenina explained.

"You are not allowed to do homework," I said.

Late at night.   Fight with my daughter that started because she  hanged around the kitchen without doing much.  "I am tired, Mom. Can I skip chorus tomorrow?  Maybe sleep in.  I am tired....", - she screams.  
I am a bit upset already.  She was rude the day before and I took away iphone and ipod and whatever "i"s I could think of.  Now, instead of thinking about finishing math, she is upset with not having her "i" things and keeps talking about them and math and science are still untouched.
For two hours she was describing how difficult the situation was and acting it out for me to make sure I got it..
Finally I got really mad and said: "Enough  No homework for you.  You are not allowed to do your homework, Immediately to bed".  And I meant it! I meant every word!
She screams even louder than before: "Nooooooooooo.  I have to finish the work!  How can you do that?!  You really do not care!!!!  I would get a zero!!! You know what it means?!   It means I would start a marking period with a ZERO!!!  Don't you understand?!I am not going anywhere until I finish the work!"
I said: "Nope You are not finishing anything.  Immediately to bed."
My 25 year old son walked in and said; "Mom, do not worry, please give her 45 min to fnishin.  She really wants to have it done. I can be here with her  Please Mom."
I said: "Ok, you have only 30 minutes.  Not more than that." and I left. 
She finished everything and got an A in Math the next day.  She said: "Mom, sorry.  Thank you so much for letting me do my homework."
What did Swamij say? "If you want the  job to be done tell your teenager that they are not allowed to do it".