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Thursday, February 3, 2011

Good Bye.

I was an only child in my family but I was blessed with two cousins.  One was three years older.  He was from my father's side,  One was  three years younger and he was from my mother's side.
Not having brothers or sisters probably intensified my feelings for both of them.  If my little "brother" was of course annoying sometimes, like all little  brothers can  be, my big "brother" was my hero.  Everything he did seemed perfect : everything ---- as perfect as he was.  I loved my uncle and aunt the same way and even when they were working abroad I could imagine hearing their voices if I wanted. I still can.  I am not trying to say that I was crazy with hearing voices but there were no real phone connections at that time within Russia, forget Australia where my uncle was a consul.
His name was Alexei Ageev.
He was a very kind man with a great sense of humor as everyone from my father's side was.
Once he started loosing hair, he shaved his head and said that "now it would be so much easier to get thoughts from Cosmos". He loved friends and good company, was a great poet, worked in Africa teaching kids for several years.  We graduated from the same University because it was a family tradition to become teachers.  Our grandmother was a great teacher and I guess we were both steered in that direction.  Both of his parents graduated from that school too.
He died three days ago.  He died from flu in Moscow in the 21st century.  Paramedics came  three times and could not figure out that it was a flu in the middle of epidemic of it, in the middle of schools being closed due to it.  They told my aunt that there were no spaces in the hospital and only after she found the connections among doctors they brought him to the hospital.  It was too late.  He was unconscious and died within three days with a complete failure of the lungs.  He did not get to be 50...
My husband was crying next to me.  He did not find any words to support me, his own pain was too much to bear.  My Alesha became a great friend to him.
My brother was not baptized and did not belong to any official religion.  At time like that I wanted to know that someone who spends most of their day connecting to God is praying for him.  Russian Orthodox church can not have a ceremony for a person who is not baptized as I learned.  My friends from Unity will  honor my prayer request, I know for sure.  
And there is a beautiful and uniting place on Earth that is far far from Moscow and US - they accepted the soul of my unbaptized brother and  performed a ceremony for him ---- ashram in India and Nithyananda.  They did not write to me  that   " everything is dust and we come and go", they did not ask me if he was from a Vedic Tradition to have a ceremony for him.   They said "We wish you strength to go through this grief.  We will pray for him in  the Temple.  Swamiji himself will bless him. Please send the picture" and several hours later "Swamiji blessed".
Oh, God!  Thank you for being here for me!  I will cry because I will not see my brother again in this form but I am so grateful that You are holding Us All in Your Hands All the  Time.  

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